Sex Tips: 41 Quickies to spice up your sex life.

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Does your sex life need a little spicing up? If so, you’ve come to the right place! Whether you’re looking to make a major change, add a little more romance or are just looking for something simple to incorporate into your lovemaking, Ive got something that will fit the bill. Be sure to keep checking back because when a new idea comes to me, I post it here to share with you.

1: Since what you eat and drink hours before sex strongly affects the way you taste, try to keep your diet somewhat bland. Alcohol, garlic, saturated fats, soy sauce and spicy foods give your secretions a bitter taste. Less spicy foods give you a more neutral taste and sugary foods will leave a sweet memory on the tongue.


2: Use birth control. Sex is much more enjoyable when any anxieties about pregnancy or contracting a sexually transmitted disease is put to rest.


3: Next time you suffer from a headache or bad PMS, don’t avoid sex. Studies have proven that the release of endorphins is a powerful painkiller.


4: Don’t let condoms interrupt your sexual extravaganza. Make putting the condom on part of foreplay. If you want to put it on your partner, try holding it very gently in your mouth, with the opening facing out. Then, use your lips and tongue to gently roll it down your lover’s penis. Just make sure you cover your teeth with your lips so you don’t break the latex. If you don’t want get that crazy, then simply roll it on with your hands. Any contact is good contact.


5: If you don’t want to or can’t use your mouth to put the condom on then still make the experience exciting; masturbate yourself for your lover to watch; lick and kiss his nipples; tell him how badly you want him to fuck you. Just don’t let all foreplay come to a screeching halt because it’s something that has to be done.


6: Emptying your bladder makes it easier to stimulate your g-spot.


7: Plan a trip to the amusement park. The surge of adrenaline and endorphins make us feel more lusty.


8: Give your lover a deep tonsil-touching kiss, at a time when sex is not possible. This allows both of your juices to get flowing and helps you anticipate your next sexual encounter.


9: During foreplay and sex, look into your lover’s eyes as you are satisfying him/her.


10: When performing cunnilingus on your woman, tell her how deliciously sweet she tastes.  Same applies when performing fellatio on your man, tell him how delicious his juices taste and how much you love his hard hot cock in your mouth.  For more great tips on cunnilingus, I highly recommend Tristan Taormino’s Expert Guide to Oral Sex: Cunnilingus.


11: Give each other a tongue bath. Start from the fingertips and lick every inch of each other’s bodies, leaving not a single patch untouched. To make it extra sweet, try dusting yourselves with an edible tasty powder. It will add a very fruity taste to your hot lover.


12: Next time you perform fellatio, take a sip of hot tea then wrap your mouth around his penis. And ask him to do the same for you. A really warm mouth, will make you both melt with pleasure. For a great tips and techniques on how to give a blow job he’ll never forget, check out How to Give a Blow job.


13: Manually stimulating a man or giving a handjob is beyond most women.  It’s all about technique, your speed, your grasp. Well, Lou Paget has solved all our problems girls, in her new book How to Be a Great Lover, Lou Paget teaches us exactly how to give a good handjob.  There are 21 techniques with detailed illustrations and instructions.  So pick up a copy of How to be a Great Lover, sit your lover down one Sunday afternoon, grab a bottle of lube and start learning the techniques.  Believe me, with the techniques you’ll be trying, he’ll be very patient. Read a detailed review of How to Be a Great Lover.


14: Although sex in the bath, is a wonderfully sensual activity, it can actually dry out your juices, so next time add a few drops of mineral oil to the water to keep things more lubricated.


15: By yourself a large blowup kiddies pool. Get yourself a couple of bottles of mineral oil, pour them onto the bottom of pool. Get your favorite sex toys. Get naked and get into the pool with your lover for an afternoon or evening full of well lubricated pleasure. Mineral oil is the best lubricant, it never dries up, so you don’t have to worry about things drying out.  Important Note: If you plan to use latex barriers during this sexual encounter, keep in mind that mineral oil is NOT latex friendly.


16: Call your lover up at work and tell him/her all the dirty nasty things you want to do when you both get home from work. The anticipation throughout the day alone, will drive you both wild. If you’re looking for dirty talking tips and techniques, I recommend Adding Dirty Talk to your Love Making.


17: Leave love notes around the house for your lover to find. Let some be sweet, let some be dirty, let some be really graphic, by the time your mate sees you, he/she will be dying to have sex.


18: Try sex first thing in the morning. Sex after a good nights sleep is much more profound. Plus, since you haven’t showered in a while, you will be stinking of your own natural sexy scent and taste, which has known to be a huge turn on for both men and women.


19: Masturbate in front of each other. When you share this solo act with your significant other, it becomes a much more exciting experience. It also allows you both to learn how to please each other from watching each other’s techniques.


20: Have sex in every room in your house/apartment. Exotic locations add a degree of excitement and naughtiness that your partner will love.


21: Different positions will definitely add excitement to your lovemaking.  The Love Swing has been the tried and true technique to get into those wacky positions.  You’re totally supported so these positions will take like no effort on your part and it sets up and packs up for storage quickly.


22: Don’t be afraid to roll play. I’m not saying to act out a scene, roll playing can also be just dressing differently than you normally do. If you normally dress very  conservative, buy yourself the smuttiest outfit you can find. If you normally dress sloppily then dress yourself to the nines. The surprise alone in your total change of appearance will drive your mate wild. 


23: Go to your local Party Store and buy yourself a strobe light. Get the room completely dark, and wear clothes that you can easily tear off. Put on some music and do a strip tease for your lover. It will turn your room into an unreal world of erotic snapshots with one sexually charged image after another.


24: Try having sex or performing a sexual act in a public place. (a public restroom, in the car while driving down the interstate, in the closet at a party, in a parking lot, on the beach, etc.) Whatever you comfortable doing, it’s the fear of being seen that arouses you the most. Just don’t get caught because it is illegal in most states.


25: Try a sex or foreplay game, like Cosmos Steamy Sex Games.  If you’re looking to make things a bit spicier, add some new positions, more foreplay, explore your partner’s body more or get those doors of sexual communication open, then this game deck is right for you.


26: Next time you have sex, try shallow penetration, instead of deep thrusting, for added excitement and stimulation. The most sensitive nerve endings for a woman, besides the clitoris, is the entrance of the vagina and for men is the head of the penis.


27: In a recent survey, by the US National Health and Social Life Survey, 50% of men aged 18-44 found watching their partners undress very exciting. The only thing ranking higher than this, was vaginal intercourse, so ladies, don’t be afraid to shed those clothes in some new, unique fashion for your man!


28: Try this, ladies, one day buy your man a copy of “Playboy” or some other adult magazine for men and leave it gift wrapped for him to find with note attached saying “Please study.” Get together some of your most seductive clothes and lay them out for him to see. When you see him again, give him a camera and tell him that you’ve always wanted to be his centerfold and thought it would be much more fun if he took the pictures. And have fun with it, let him direct you.

Use props: scarves, jewelry. Do some of the same shots that are in the magazine. And then when the time is right, invite him into the action. For your Naughty Photo Shoot, you’ll need: a digital camera; an adult magazine (Playboy, Hustler, Penthouse, etc.), a very naughty outfit and some accessories to use in photos.


29: Here’s a way to set a cozy, fantasy love nest for your mate. You need some down filled pillows (or if you or your mate are allergic, something equal to its comfort), feather boas, and a variety of feathers (these can be found at most craft type shops).

Lay down a sheet and begin to setup your nest. Scatter your pillows, boas and feathers about to make a comfy, yet eye appealing place to make love to your significant other. And when the time comes, turn out the lights and light some candles then lead your blindfolded lover into your new love nest. It’s amazing how changing the look or feel to your bedroom, living room, etc. makes a sexual encounter feel more exciting.


30: Draw a fragrant bath with a Lush Bath Bomb for your lover, light some candles in the bathroom and play some real soft music or relaxing sounds cd or tape. Get your lover naked and in the tub first and give him/her an all over body massage. And in the beginning make it a real massage, relaxing your partner. Then when your partner is completely relaxed, focus your massage on the most intimate of areas. And when the time is right, don’t worry, you’ll know it, do a slow strip show for your lover and get in the tub with him/her.


31: Here’s something for you to try one morning, if you wake up before your lover does, as you snuggle up and wake up him/her gently and carefully go down on him or her. This can be very exciting because your lover is totally relaxed and can almost be brought into another state of ecstasy. Just make sure you do it gently and slowly and be careful. There’s nothing like waking up in the morning with a little bit of loving.


32: This one is for women who are not into or excited by pornographic films. These films are more on the erotic side than the hardcore side, and is great for couples to watch together. I recommend The Art of Sex 2 to get you started. For additional titles check out my adult film reviews.


33: Take the time to plan a romantic rendezvous. It doesn’t have to be at the best vacation resort and cost you thousands of dollars. It could just be one night or one weekend at a local hotel. There are many hotels out there that offer theme rooms and jacuzzis. You can rent them in hourly slots and they are so super fun. Some of them have rooms with stripper poles, champagne glass jacuzzis. The options are endless.


34: If you are interested in real sexual vacation, I suggest checking out Desire Resorts. It’s an adults only, all inclusive resort that has all kinds of sexy activities going on in a setting that will have the 2 of you so relaxed and ready ravage each other.


35: Here’s a way to add a little naughtiness to your weekend!  You will need: a new perfume or cologne, a naughty little note and a very naughty attitude.  Start off by purchasing a new perfume or cologne. Then write a naughty little note to your partner. Something like:

“This is my hypnotic note of love. Today, when you hear me say the word, “fragrance,” you will have an uncontrollable desire to go into the bedroom and take a nap. :) Once there, you will not be able to open your eyes, use your hands or speak; no matter what I do to you. I can’t wait to pleasure you!”

Leave this note by your lover’s coffee cup or whatever he/she uses first thing on Saturday or Sunday morning. Later in the day, when some of the weekend chores have been completed, spray on your new scent and snuggle up close to your lover.

Ask him/her if he/she likes your new fragrance. Then watch how quickly your lover gets up and goes into the bedroom. Give your lover a few moments alone to get settled and quietly enter the room. Now, you don’t want to wake your lover, so you must be very gentle as you undress and explore your lover’s body.

It’s up to you to do whatever you want to tease and tantalize your mate. Kiss ever inch of your lover’s body, caress and rub your partner’s body, find new erogenous zones. Take your time and tune into your lover’s pleasure. As your man gets excited, rub the area between his scrotum and anus or as your woman gets aroused, gently rub her vaginal lips together. (This safely and gently stimulates the clit.) Make your partner squirm for more. And when the time is right, bring him/her to a rousing orgasm.

For more great sex tips like this one, be sure to check out Laura Corn’s “101 Nights of Grrreat Sex


36: This is actually a little game between you and your lover(s). If you’ve never really talked dirty before than this is a great way to start and if you are already a dirty talker, than you’re well prepared to play the game. Now, if you’ve never really talked dirty before, you must prepare yourself with a naughty vocabulary. So you might have to do some research. The quickest and easiest way to do that is to watch some adult movies.

All this research will give you the opportunity to finally put into words all those naughty things you want to do with your lover. If you want, keep a journal of all your naughty thoughts. That way when it’s time to play, you can take a quick look back at everything you thought of. Now, I know you’re wondering what all this preparation is for, so here it is.

You and your lover are going to tease each other to death without touching, without fondling, but by just talking. And see how long you can stand it before jumping each others’ bones. Now, since you’re only teasing each other with words, you can’t have any lights on. It must be dark in the room and you both must sit away from each other.
Remember, there’s no touching or fondling involved. You have to tell each other all the nasty, naughty things you want to do each other. You can ask each other questions.

You can tell each other how sexy you both are. If you get really excited and want to pleasure yourself, you can explain to your lover, in graphic detail, what you’re doing. The idea is to get each other so hot, that you can’t bear another moment without having the other person. The idea is to be naked while playing, but I think it would be fun to put something really sexy on for your lover to see you in, kiss each other passionately (to get yourselves started), then turn out the lights and sit in your separate areas. Having the lights out, makes it easier for those that are new to talking dirty because the pressure of looking your lover in the eyes is not there.

Now, if you’re partner’s not a dirty talker, then you need to prepare him or her for the upcoming competition. Leave him or her a note saying something like: “Honey, very soon there is going to be a friendly competition. But don’t worry, everyone wins. The game is called ,”Talk Dirty to Me Baby.” If you could tell me all the naughty things you want to do me, what would you say? Shortly, you will have the chance to drive me wild, but only with your thoughts and words. And I get to do the same to you. I can’t wait to hear how you want to pleasure me and I can’t wait to tell you all the naughty things I want to do to you. So, are you up for a little friendly competition? I’ve given you a few days to get your thoughts together. I can’t wait to take you on the ride of a lifetime!” I think this will have your lover rather excited, anticipating game day. Have fun with it!

To get comfortable with dirty talk, I recommend: Talk To Me Baby – A Lover’s Guide To Dirty Talk And Role Play


#37: Men are very visual creatures, meaning they love to watch things. So it’s always better to make a show out of your lovemaking. Here’s a great example I tried this past weekend and it worked like a charm.

Next time you give your man oral pleasure remove his pants, have him sit down on the floor, remove your clothes, get on all fours and start to work on him. He’s enjoying himself at this point, but wait…there’s something missing. You have your luscious behind up in the air, but he’s not really looking at it at the right angle to really appreciate it.

This is when you get up and get a mirror, make sure you keep it nearby and place it up against the wall behind you. Get right back down on all fours and continue pleasuring. Having the view of not only you actually orally pleasuring him, but then being able to stare at your precious bottom all exposed will send him through the roof!

All you need to pull this off is a large mirror. A popular one that works great and that almost everyone has is the cheapy kind you hang or stick on the back of your door. It’s nice and long so you’ll know it’s long enough to get you in.


#38: Now, if you don’t want to hang some crazy swing in your bedroom, living room or closet the fine folks at One Up Innovations have come up with a wonderful set of cushions called Liberator Shapes. They make sex fun and very comfortable…and they’re very pleasing to look at too. I kept my set in our livingroom for a week and no one knew they had anything to do with sex. In fact, a friend of mine used to come over and watch TV laying on the set, they’re that comfortable and that discreet.


#39: Sex in the water can be a blast, but be aware that all that water it can be very drying for the vagina because it flushes all the natural lubrication out. Keep in mind that pools and hot tubs are extremely drying because of all the chemicals. A silicone based lubricant like Sliquid Silicone will stay around a little bit longer than a regular water-based lubricant. Don’t be afraid to play in water, just keep the amount of time you’re in the water limited.


#40: Speaking of playing in the water, there are some great waterproof toys available so you don’t have leave them behind anymore. A fun one is the Vibrating Rubber Ducky. Then there are even more discreet sponge vibrators.


#41: Next time you want to watch a sexy movie, have her pick the title that makes her the most excited. By letting your lover pick the porn title, she’ll ultimately be more comfortable watching and more excited by it too. For recommendations on couple friendly movies.

Ann Andriani
My name is Ann Andriani. Since 1999, I've helped millions of folks sort through their questions and curiosities about sex. I hope that you enjoy your stay with me and benefit from my thoughts and sex advice.

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